Firstly, how beautiful is this dress?
 It's by Olivier Theyskens. I'm not great with words, so I'll better not ruin it by attempting to analyse why it's so beautiful.
It just is beautiful.
Secondly, I really need to vent my spleen about some things. Skip this part if you want.
One of the types of people that annoy me the most are the ones with over-inflated egos. The ones who have no sense whatsoever of modesty, of the fact that perhaps, they aren't as great as they think. I know that we should have goals and dreams, but as Patrick Wolf sings in Don't Say No:
" I used to say just follow your heart
But my heart always led me in circles
and i used to say just follow your dreams
but my dreams always led me to murder"
Alot of the times, you also need to keep reality in check. In a similar way, the people that try too hard annoy me too; especially the ones that try and try and try to be different, to be classy, to be the trendsetter, etc. [dw if I was talking about you, you wouldn't be my friend in the first place] I know that everyone wants to be unique - no one wants to just be 'part of the crowd'. But sometimes, by trying to stand out, you just end up trying to be someone else and then;; you've become some pretentious fake snob with an overinflated ego. Like those people that say, "I don't conform". By that, they just mean that they are rebellious, rude, and are apathetic to everything. If you truly didn't conform, you'd be living in the middle of a desert as a recluse, and living off the land.
Maybe Im pms-ing. uh oh - catching the plane tmr. Not so good.
On a different note, my Dad knows me all too well. He knows my weakness, and where to strike. Over dinner he told me that if I came back to China at around the same time as my Mum and Bro [ie, early to mid-December], we could all go to Japan. He actually planned the trip for this holiday, but since I had all my revision in mind, i opted for HongKong and Macau instead...waay less stressful and less likely to distract me. I mean, JAPAN? Just the thought of going makes me hyper.
So, shall I spend New Years, when i'll be finally 18, in wintry [i shiver at the word], but must-see Japan, with my family;; or shall it be with my friends in summery and cosy Sydney, celebrating the end of twelve years of schooling?
I said my Dad knew my weaknesses. I could deny either options. But it seems so mean to my family to snub them, and yet i seem to be forgoing so much everytime I leave my friends. Especially since this time, it will be the last I'll see of them for a year. I think I've talked about it before, but never as a definite thing. The plan is, Im going to take a gap year to come back to China to learn Chinese properly at a uni here. We've already checked out the uni. It's ugly btw. The semester starts in Feb, so I was planning to spend NYE in Sydney and come back mid Jan. Twas perfect, till Dad came along.
Too many dilemmas for such a little person.
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nnnooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
you know what im saying.
x